While working as a gestalt therapist, Yevgeny Veritov identified several important things for himself. According to him, although they sound rather simple, they have a great influence on what happens to us.
We suggest that you read and study the advice of a psychologist, which, perhaps, will someday help make your life better.
1. People behave as they do, and do what they do, not because they are such bastards, but because something made them so. Even the most real bastard has gone some way before becoming one, and, perhaps, simply does not understand that one can do something differently.
This awareness has a good effect on the ability to accept people. Especially well this awareness helps to accept parents and let go of some of their children’s stories.
2. However, you do not have to accept those you dislike. The ability not to accept is no less important than the ability to accept.
In general, not having to deal with people you don’t like unnecessarily is a healthy and rewarding practice.
3. Tell people how you feel. Teach people that you are the person who speaks out your feelings.
By doing this, in the long term, you will do well for yourself and for them. Even if you still think that it is not. Even if they still think that it is not so.
4. When you express your feelings – use the wording “I feel hurt” instead of the wording “you are a goat.” Then you are more likely to be heard.
This rule is much more valuable than you think. Even if you think this rule is valuable, it is still more valuable than you think.
5. Trust in another is a significant gift that you give, first of all, to yourself.
6. The processes that take place in us, even if we do not like them, perform some important function for us. It’s just that sometimes they conflict or protect us not only from unpleasant experiences, but also from important ones.
7. Positive thinking is rubbish. It distracts from real problems and from real tasks.
8. We find it difficult with those things that change our ideas about ourselves. Even if they change them for the better. Such is the paradox.
9. Do not ask “can a person really think / feel / act like that?” Yes maybe. He still can’t do that. Man is generally an amazing thing.
10. If you ignore your feelings and emotions, then your psyche will definitely give you back. If she has not done this yet, it means that she is saving up strength to weigh the bream harder.
11. Pelevin was right: figuring out why you ended up in your butt and getting out of it is often two independent processes.
If, in order to get out of the ass, you need to figure out how you got into it, you will figure it out. So it’s better to immediately focus on “getting out.”
12. Parents can be disliked. Yes, you don’t have to love mom and dad. And you can love.
13. It’s great when your feelings, values and thoughts are respected, but, in fact, no one is obliged to do this.
If you think otherwise, then most likely you will have a hard time.
14. What we do not know in ourselves controls us more than what we know in ourselves.
15. Reading books on psychology is very exciting. But if you want results and do not want to become a psychologist yourself, you better sign up to someone who has read these books for a long time and has safely forgotten.
What do you think about this?